Aimee: Lauren, how did you get started in music? 

Lauren: I started taking piano lessons when I was five through the Suzuki Method, and I did that through high school, Kind of the turning point in my musical journey was that I didn't want to go to my zoned high school, so I auditioned for a performing arts high school in the area, and I got in and. It was a great high school experience, and I felt like everyone was so welcoming. When I think about stereotypical high school, I thought that there would be a lot of mean girls, but I felt like everyone was so kind and was weird in their own way, and it was great, and I loved it. While I was there, I took vocal jazz, an opera workshop class, and started taking voice lessons. I really liked opera but I fell in love with musical theater first. I saw my first opera at Santa Fe Opera, which was Puccini’s Madame Butterfly, and it was awesome. I loved it. It was like musical theater, but on steroids. It felt like my kind of singing, like the singing that I could do. My dad's a doctor, so I get asked a lot about why didn't I go into medicine?  I was never really interested in going into medicine, and I still liked singing, so I thought, “well, I'll just go to college for music, and if I hate it at the end of it, I'll just, do something else,” so that's kind of how I got started.

Aimee: That sounds great. You mentioned you started voice lessons in high school, but did you sing before that?

Lauren: I was in elementary school choir in 4th grade, and I didn't like it, so I quit in fifth grade. I rejoined when I was in middle school and was in show choir, which I loved; I was obsessed! All my friends were friends show choir too. I didn't do any shows in junior high, but when I got into high school, I was in the ensemble for Hairspray, and then I was in Oklahoma. I still sung in choir, but I didn't do a lot of shows because it was very, very, very competitive high school, and it was hard to get cast in a show. When I was in the ensemble in Hairspray my sophomore year, it was like the most amazing thing that could have ever happened to me in my whole life. It was so intense because everyone was very good, but I loved it.

Aimee: So then you decided to pursue music, how many schools did you apply to for undergrad? 

Lauren: I only applied to three schools: Pepperdine, Westmont, and Wheaton. Wheaton was the wild card because it was not a Southern California option. I auditioned at Westmont, and it's not a very competitive music program or it wasn't it. I felt like it was relaxed, but when I went to visit Westmont, it was heavily under construction. Westmont is beautiful now, but at the time, I did not want to go there. Pepperdine was my dream school, and then I had a bizarre audition experience. No one really came to greet me. It was very weird, and I got the sense that their music program wasn't very serious. I wanted a music program that was more intense, and I wanted go to Christian College. When I went to Wheaton for my audition, I remembered for the audition they required real scores. I didn't know that, and I had copies, and I was panicking. The admissions coordinator Debbie had her assistant go to the library for me and get me all the music I needed for me. I remember that they were so nice, and I had a great experience at the audition, even though it was kind of stressful. I thought “this really looks like a serious music program and seems like everything I want.” I also have some family history with Wheaton and my grandparents, and some other family members went there so, that's how I chose the school. 

Aimee: What was your experience at Wheaton, and how did you feel like you grew as a singer? 

Lauren: I feel grateful for my Wheaton experience. I think it was absolutely the right place for me to be, especially working at University of Michigan now. It's very intense at Michigan, and I think Wheaton was a very nurturing environment, and I really appreciated that. I felt close to my singing colleagues and everyone else in a music school. So, having that community was special to me. I had a teacher through high school that was borderline abusive, like the teacher in the movie Whiplash.  A little bit of that, not quite as intense, but after my senior year in high school, I was like this is not what I want, and singing doesn't feel good. At Wheaton, I was still learning how to listen to the voice in my head telling me what is good, what feels good, but it was so hard to. I think I learned a lot about singing and about music; All of the things that I didn't know. I liked my voice studio environment. It felt so fun, and it was really positive experience for me. I think Dr. Holman did a great job making me audition at NATS and go do all these auditions. She was very helpful in encouraging me to just go out and do the thing. That was helpful to see how time changes your perception of things because right now when I look back on college, it's hard for me to view it even through the lens of success and failure. It felt like a period of growth, and if I put myself back in my shoes in college, there were some successes that seemed clear, like I singing Pamina. But I was devastated at the time when I didn't get the role in Impresario. I really wanted that Impresario role. I didn't get it, and I was devastated. Looking back on that now, things felt so high and so low, but now everything's kind of evened out. It seems like success and failure is so up and down, but more than likely, I will look back on this in 10 years and see that it is all just a part of my journey of growth. I did a couple of summer programs when I was in college, and I did this one called Up North Vocal Institute, which was very fun, and I had a very positive experience there. We did like a lot of art song singing, and I also did Utah Vocal Arts after my senior year, which was also a good experience.

Aimee: What did you do at UVA during the summer? 

Lauren: I sang Najade in Ariadne auf Naxos and covered Zerbinetta. They didn't assign covers, but I was like, “hey, can I cover this, and they said sure.”  It was very self-led.  

Aimee: That’s great to hear. I want to know, before you finished at Wheaton, you decided to go on for your Master’s. What was your experience with your graduate school audition process like?  

Lauren: I applied to so many schools that I don’t even remember at this point. I have always been a big proponent of throwing your hat in every ring possible course, so that was my strategy. I was applying to grad school, so I was like, “okay I’m going to apply everywhere.” It cost me an arm and a leg to do this because those applications are not cheap. I did like twenty or something insane like that because I think the problem maybe with Wheaton was, I didn't exactly have a great sense of my level of ability. Through the graduate school process, I discovered that maybe I'm not at the level that I think I am. I did have success in college, so I thought maybe this is possible. Then, I applied to Juilliard, but I felt like Juilliard always was a long shot, you know, and I understood that. I got cut, but then I didn't get through to the audition rounds for a lot of different schools. I think maybe the most devastating blow was, funnily enough, was that I really wanted to come to the University of Michigan. I really felt that Michigan was the place. I had some trial lessons with people, and I liked studying with Dr. Kanyova the best. She was my favorite teacher, but I liked Michigan's vibe. I really liked the vibe of being a part of a giant school with football. I don’t think I had a true college experience, and there was something appealing to me about being in a Big 10 school. It seemed super fun, but I didn't like the lesson I took with someone there. I didn't hate it, and I still wanted to go there. I didn't even get an audition out of Michigan, and I was devastated. I remember, several other people in our class got auditions and it felt discouraging. I did have auditions at several schools, which gave me hope. I auditioned in person at the University of Missouri Kansas City, Roosevelt University, Missouri State University, and Indiana University. As the audition process went on, it was the first time I had traveled by myself to audition. I traveled and auditioned at to Missouri State University and Roosevelt University all on my own. After I got past the Michigan thing, I knew I wanted to study with Maria, and come.  I got into all the schools I auditioned for which were not super challenging schools to get into. I did think about Missouri. State, since they gave me a large financial offer, bigger than University of Missouri. I considered the teacher, but we were not cut from the same cloth. Then Indiana, I did also consider it too. I had taken a sample lesson with a professor, but a friend of mine told me that she felt like Indiana was so big, and she didn't get a role until her last year there, and it was a small role. I was very concerned about that because I just wanted to sing, so I picked the UMKC, and that was kind of the end of that journey. 

Aimee: While you were at UMKC, what roles did you have during your Master’s? 

Lauren: I sang the Dew Fairy in Hänsel und Gretel, which was fun. Then I sang Le Feu in L’enfant et les sortileges by Ravel, Serpetta in Mozart’s La finta giardiniera. I also covered Adele in Die Fledermaus; it's all kind of a blur. 

Aimee: That’s a lot of roles in four semesters, wow! Since you’ve done your Master’s and DMA at UMKC, what has your experience been like? 

Lauren: In my masters, I felt like I was successful in getting roles because Fenlon Lamb liked me, and I won some favor with her. I had a pretty good run for a while and then you know the directors shift, and they pick their new favorites. At UMKC, I saw it kind of shift around, and I think that's just kind of part of the business, going through periods where you're feeling like you're getting a lot and then going through periods where you feel like you're not getting anything. For a while at the beginning, I'll just use Maggie [changed for privacy] as an example because she's my dear friend, and she would probably say the same thing. For a while, I was getting roles and Maggie was covering me, and then it switched to Maggie getting roles, and I was covering her. So that's just kind of life. 

Aimee: Did you audition for the concerto/aria competition at UMKC? 

Lauren: I was a finalist in the Concerto Aria during my Master's degree for singing Handel, which was random. I didn’t win, and I was saddened by it. I've been a finalist a lot of times in that competition, and I've never won, which I have been bummed about every time, but you just keep trying. One year, Anna Mans and I both sang Knoxville Summer of 1915 in the finals, and so that's just like, “How are you going to pick?” That was a particularly tough loss because I really love that piece, and it's just hard competing with your friends because they are people that you really admire and that you want to be rooting for. It's kind of a cognitive dissonance. There is no room to not cheer for each other, but at the same time, we're always up for the same thing. I think Maggie recently sung Mabel, and I also auditioned for that gig. I hoped I would get it, but then she got it. I was so excited for her to sing it, but at the same time, I still let myself mourn, for the loss of this opportunity. 

Aimee: That makes total sense! During the summer between your first and second year, did you do summer program? 

Lauren: No, so kind of the other theme that runs through my summer program experience is that I have had to say no. I've chosen personal commitments over some opportunities, and I think I would do it again. I've been in so many weddings and all of my friends get married over the summer. I had a wedding every year for almost five years, including my own, during the summer. I could say no to these things and still be there for my friend or I can let down one of my friends who feels like family for singing in this thing that doesn't feel like it really matters. Probably the best example of that is the summer of 2020, I got an offer to do Marie in the Daughter of the Regiment, and it was just a small program. I think it was Spotlight on Opera, and it paid. I said no because I was going to be at felt friend Anna's wedding and then I met David my now husband at that wedding. I just feel like that was a lesson that things can be so fleeting. Singing gigs will come and go, but these relationships in your life are so worth investing in. It was really hard for me to say no to that opportunity, but then it didn't even happen because of the pandemic.  

Aimee: Wow that is all so true, and thanks for sharing your perspective, I know a lot of others feel similarly. I want to know why you decided to continue your education after your Masters? 

Lauren: I wanted to keep studying with Maria, and I had always considered getting a doctorate, even in math. I always thought about continuing, and it felt like the right time. I felt like I wasn't ready to be solely auditioning, and I had more to learn. 

Aimee: I know part of your doctorate was during the pandemic, so before the shutdown, did you have any roles?  

Lauren: I sang Belinda in the Fall of 2019 and then the 2020 shutdown happened, and it was a vastly different landscape. When I started auditioning for things, I was told that I had already had too many opportunities at UMKC to be considered for another opportunity. I was very disappointed because I only have one role on my resume from my doctoral degree. On the plus side, I learned a lot about singing, and it all kind of balances out. I started learning roles, like Adina, and I was just doing my own thing. It was kind of a blessing because the doctorate was quite hard, and I feel like I was doing all these recitals, and doing all of this other singing and COVID kind of shook me, as it shook all of us.  

Aimee: How did you keep going when you had an unsuccessful audition season? 

Lauren: It’s hard, but I think what really keeps me going is leaning on my support system and especially the support system of people like Maggie and Stephanie who are out there doing it too. I think it's very easy to feel isolated and feel like I'm the only one this is happening to, but it's not. It's not at all. Leaning on people has been helpful because I realized that I don't know the YAP Circuit. It is one very, very, very narrow pathway into this career, and I strongly believe that you can have a very successful career without getting into any major YAP.  Talking to people through disappointments is important, allowing time to grieve the loss, especially if it feels particularly painful. I think I'm so used to rejection now, that sometimes they don't bother me at all. Sometimes it's like, “whatever, I've never gotten an audition for Glimmerglass, so why let that bother me?” But sometimes they do feel particularly poignant, and I think it's important to allow time to mourn for that. I also think it's important to immediately find another audition or immediately find another opportunity, because with the things that I haven't gotten, I have had other opportunities come up in their place that I'm very excited about and that allow me for instance to stay in Michigan with my tiny little family and not leave that. The last thing I want to say is something that has helped me immensely through auditioning and comparison is that I am much wiser about my social media habits because for a while it was making me feel so bad, seeing what everyone else was doing during the summer. I don't ever have it on my phone anymore, but I download it once a week for a couple hours, then I will do a post something or do a big update post then quickly see what other people are doing, just to make sure I'm like in the loop, and then I'll just delete it again. I think interacting in that way and using it as like a “here's what singing things I'm doing so people know that I'm still singing” because I do think it's very important to stay relevant on social media, but I just I have found my mental health is so much better not being on it so much. 

Aimee: That’s a really great perspective and mindset to have. I want to know what you think: do you feel like the stereotype of you can only make it in this industry if you get to the Met has changed or remained the same? 

Lauren: I think that's changed. I mean, a lot of people throughout my life have been successful and define what that is for them. I think for me still when I envision success, I envision singing roles at bigger companies. That is success for me at this point, and I think it could change. I've never been a super big fan of the Met in recent years, just with what works they're producing there. I think it's getting a little bit better with some newer works and championing new compositions, but I think for what it's worth, there are other companies doing much more exciting things than that. You know, the singing career has kind of stopped me from being such a planner because I think it's just how do you plan for this career? There's no way you can try. You can try and it will take you in weird directions. I have role goals, so roles that I would like to sing, and some of those are Adele, Zerbinetta, and Gretel. I don't often think about house goals, but one that I do have is Santa Fe Opera. I would love to sing at Santa Fe because that was like my first experience as an audience member, and I think that it's such a fun house. I also really want to do more crossover work in musical theater. That is another big dream. I think these goals inform my personal singing life in that I just want to be the best singer I can be. That sounds cheesy, but I think that is what is keeping me going. When I am finding new things in my voice that are surprising to me or the ability to sing things that I didn't think I had or finding more stylistic diversity in musical theater and opera, things like that. That is really what keeps me going. I think even more so than that, it's the feeling of true release and true connection to character and true flexibility in singing. That is what keeps me going too. 

Aimee: Those are such great goals! The last question I want to ask is, are there any ways that you think that the industry could be more equitable to allow for more sopranos?  

Lauren: I think resident artist companies could hire two Sopranos as opposed to the typical one. I think that would open up a lot more. I think when I'm going in and I know I'm competing for one soprano spot, that's not even a role that they're casting. Sometimes it's just a soprano of all trades, so I think even people hiring a couple different young artists could help sopranos so much. I think the other thing is that when I'm applying, I think of myself as an applicant, and I don't have any major yaps on my resume, but I sing really well, and I'm very confident in my singing. I think some places rely very heavily on what you've done in the past, and your pedigree as far as school goes. I really wish they could listen to singers without focusing so heavily at that. I understand, but I think it causes this cycle of singers that are going from program to program to program, and it is difficult for singers like me to bust in there. I also think this is the last thing I'll say that it's on singers themselves to not pigeonhole themselves into only doing YAPs. Because even this community theater role, I'm learning a lot about how to be on stage and about singing and I think it makes me a better singer, so find other things because the system is something we can't really rely on.

Aimee: Thanks for sharing all that, Lauren! You gave our readers some great things to think about and be encouraged by!